When we return home with our little one, we begin to enter a new reality that we had more or less expected.
Returning home is a highly anticipated moment, because we know that from now on our baby will be able to get to know his or her own place and all the new things he or she will find. He or she may meet our pet who is anxious to get to know him or her, or he or she may have a brother or sister waiting for him or her, who will want to see him or her and find out what he or she is like.
We understand that it's a big impact for everyone, trying to manage all the emotions that can arise, and parents always want everything to go well. However, today we're leaving that moment of arriving home to one side and moving on to the next moment - the visits.
Visits may have already started while we were still in hospital, or at home, which is where we are most likely to have even more people close to us, family and friends who want to get to know our little one. It's only natural that we want to be able to spend time with the people we love, to get to know the new member of the family. However, sometimes the visits can cause some anxiety, as there can be so many of them, all at the same time and for such a long time.
Well, today we wanted to give you some tips for this moment. We don't want to see parents overwhelmed and anxious about these situations, which should be according to the indications given by the parents, either through context or even availability. After all, we're talking about a time when parents want to bond with their little one.
So we tried to figure out what tips we could put into practice during visits, so that everything runs smoothly and the parents are relaxed.
The first tip we found was to define some basic rules, even before the baby is born, as this will be a way of managing the expectations of those who visit us. Parents will need all the time they need to adapt, to realise how they feel and to get to know the baby that has just arrived. They can establish that in these early days they don't want visitors and that they'll let you know when the time is right. We're sure that everyone will accept and respect your decision.
A second tip that we find very interesting is to invite positive people. We don't want a negative, judgemental atmosphere. This is the phase when you're discovering your new role as mum and dad. The house may be a bit of a mess, there may be some confusion, which is natural and doesn't require unwanted comments. In this way, we can be selective in our visits and feel good about them.
A third tip is to say no to surprise and unexpected visits to your baby. When we are already at home, visits should be scheduled over the phone, so we know who, when and how the visit will take place. Parents will feel less stressed and can plan the visit in the way that is most comfortable for them.
With visits can come unwanted advice, which brings us to the fourth tip we've found. When you approach the subject of parenthood, it's likely that some advice will come your way, and you may or may not agree with it. They may come from family, friends or strangers and we believe they cause a certain amount of confusion for parents who are just starting out on this journey. We may believe some of them or not agree with others, but being judged and criticised for the way parents are dealing with this new reality is unreasonable and the best response to these situations will be to maintain the certainty that it may have worked in the situation of the person giving the advice, but to point out that in our situation the way we think is the most correct is the one we are following.
The fifth and final tip in today's post is to accept any help that comes your way. We can delegate some tasks that we can't manage at the moment, such as shopping at the market or cooking a couple of meals for the parents. We think that friends and family won't mind helping out in these small situations and will be happy to help.
We know that people want to help in one way or another, but we believe that there are situations in which parents really should put their own way first, because from then on, any help or situations that exist, people will already have a better idea of what is best for the parents and the baby. It's a matter of common sense and allowing parents to enjoy these first moments with their baby, especially in their own home. Giving space and time is essential.
By saying this, we don't mean that visits are a negative thing, on the contrary. Visits are positive, because we like to know that the people we love most want to know how we are and get to know our little one. However, they can be stressful and confusing situations for parents. So the main idea we want to convey with the research we've done and today's post is - if you're thinking of visiting us, planning and asking us questions is the first and most important step, and parents will appreciate it.
What about you? Did you have many visitors during your first moments at home with your little one? How did you manage the visits? Any tips you'd like to share? We want to know your experience. We want to know your opinion.
